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But I did it anyway
I knew this was how it was going to be
mourning the end of the best summer of my life
I'm at my parents house trying to feel comfortable. Life is going to suck for a while. My favorite person isn't going to be around. There's going to be lots of work (school, office, cafe) and little pay. I'll just have to plough through and deal. Is this living life? God, I put myself through shit.
Next-Wave gets a face lift...
next wave has a new look, a new url, and a new editor.
I want a new computer. My current one really sucks. My parents bought it in 1996 and when they got a new one in 2001 I inherited it. It has a 119 MHz Pentium (I) processor, and 96 MB of RAM. The CD-ROM drive is dying, the zip drive is dead - I tried reinstalling it and now it will eject my disks but it still can't access the data on the disk. Ever since I installed XP my printer and scanner haven't worked. I tried downloading the drivers but my hardware was too old. My monitor died, but we had another sitting in our basement that works pretty well.

I dream about having a laptop with wireless internet, a cd burner, a big processor and tons of RAM.

I am a computer science major. I will be doing research in the fall and I would like to be able to work on projects from home - I'd like to install Linux and Windows in a dual boot, but my current computer isn't capable.

I am working on the website for Frank Moe's campaign - a better system would make this so much easier.

The problem is I'm poor. I have been trying to save off and on for the last 2 years, but that savings turned into tuition and then money for Eurospring. Maybe I should just take out another loan - compound some more debt on to my student loans.

Anyone want to donate a computer to me:)
Some thoughts
"still I judge success by how I'm dressing...":: caedmon's call

so the root of the ramble : drop those meaningless things that look spiritual and accept nothing less than an authentic relationship with your Creator.
early service:2am
8-bit D&D
For every role player or anyone who has dated one.
via fishpie
This is for Ben
Wesley Willis, 1963-2003
seeking stories beauty meaning
Daniel Miller where are you? We miss you - please post again.
You have insulted the poor
what have we come to that it is illegal to be publicly poor?
you are not here
This photo is of the beach in Barcelona, Spain today. It's beautiful and awesome and wondrous. You are not there. You are here, reading this, at work or at home, wishing you were on vacation. Snap out of it! Get back to work!
Experiments in Justice :: How some Middle-class Folks Tried Living on Minimum Wage for Lent
They couldn't do it. You can read their account here
via Jordon Cooper
the obsession of blogging
"Who in their right mind obsesses over the best way to post photographs and which is the best directory structure in which to post them?" I have been thinking about this for days. Not good.
Jordon Cooper

...Charlie's wife shared something of her grief with the congregation. There was a real moment Saturday night where she opened her heart. That moment can never be captured in words. I was tempted to try, and I'm ashamed to say that while she was speaking I was trying to think of a way to write it down.
real live preacher
Um, yea
can everyone tell that it is a super slow day at work?
insight from froyd
After reading my file sharing post Sean IMed me with a few comments (I really need to get a comment function enabled). Here they are for everyone to enjoy:

One thing that Troy undoubtedly DIDN'T tell you is that the pirates who are causing the most damage are NOT the downloaders, for precisely the reason you pointed out. Downloaders will sometimes buy the CD, and therefore it will be beneficial for record companies. As well, the recording companies are not selling many CDs for the reasons of technology. They sold CD after CD after CD in the last 10 years because everyone was updating their cassette/record collections to the new technology. Now that they have them updated, there is no more massive buying going on. Also, it is the pirates in the far east (Asia) in China and Taiwan and Korea that bootleg the cds and then sell them for 3 or 4 bucks. THAT is the massive market that the record companies are losing 75% of their shirt on. Casual downloaders such as me or you, are a molecule in the water that is flowing out of the record companies bucket, which has so many holes. They are targeting the easy persons, not the serious trouble.


"The congregations who do the best in church finances have a rich, full, abiding compassion for mission. They are motivated by a theology of service, not a theology of survival. Their compelling, driving spirit is one of giving, serving, loving mission."

Kennon Callahan via Jason Evans

While I was at my parents' last night, my dad was at church fixing up the basement kitchen. When he got home he told my mom and me about all the things the recent resigned janitor did wrong. From that he went on to how everything is done wrong at church including hosting the weekly Soup Kitchen (we don't want to share our nice stuff - come on people stop being so selfish). It made me think about how much our church focuses on our building, our finances. We constatly ask for money - building fund, youth group, faith & fellowship, etc. My church seems completely focused on it self. We never do missions, we never reach out to the neighborhood we are in. We are too content in our nice Sunday worship to get our hands dirty with helping others.

I am so frustrated with the lack of spirtituality there. It is devoid of feeling. On Sundays we begin with announcements - talking about ourselves, how wonderful we are, who is doing what, etc. Then the reader reads the opening prayer, but before they do, they introduce themselves to the congregation. They tell how long they have been members, who they are married to, who their kids are, church groups they are involved in and sometimes they even mention their job or business. Nothing like some free advertising right after you tell the congregation how virtuous you are.

When we finally do get to the prayer it feels weird, out of place. Like an after thought. "Oh yeah, we are at church we are supposed to be worshiping or something - God is good and stuff."

I happen to be on the worship committee and have brought this fact up numerous times. I also happen to be the only one under 30 on the committee. Everytime I am told to bring it up again at the next meeting - "we can't do anything about it, the readers for this quarter have been sent directions that include introducing themselves - we will deal with it later."

This is another part of my not attending this church this summer.

Then I read that quote on The Living Home and it brought all the pent up frustrations back. I feel like I need to do something - but I feel like nobody at church wants to change.

Save Christiania, August 30th march in Copenhagen
Christiania is the Permanent Autonomous Zone in Copenhagen: an old military base that has been successfully squatted for decades now. It's most notorious for the open-air cannabis market at its center, but thinking of Christiania as a pot-market does it a terrible disservice. Christiania is a living proof of the possibility of life outside of the constraints of traditional govenrment, of the possibility of having a neighborhood secede from civil society and a city, and still remain an integral part of it. From the beautiful collage buildings to the brilliant blacksmiths who hammer out the Christiania Bikes that are prized throughout Europe, Christiania is fragile, beautiful and inspiring.

The Danish government, in an uncharacterstic show of extremely poor sense, has decided that it must "normalize" Christiania -- that is, raze it and kill it. Danes are not happy about this. If you're within rail-distance of Copenhagen on August 30th, you can help shame the Danish government into taking its hands off of Christiania at a mass demonstration.

Saturday the 30th of August 2003 special trains are departuring from Aalborg, ?rhus, Vejle, Fredericia and Odense. Moreover there will be special busses leaving from 45 Danish towns. Tickets can be bought at BILLETNET
The popular parade begins at Carl Madsens Plads, Christiania at Noon. The parade meets all the guests arriving by trains and buses at Copenhagen Central Train station at 1.30 p.m., where a short ceremony will take place. At 3 p.m. the parade reaches Christiansborg Castle (Parliament) where we'll give the publicly elected a piece of our mind. The parade ends at Christiania around 5 p.m. where a huge multicultural feast starts with many, many kinds of music and cultural entertainment. All bands, artists, speakers and performers, known and unknown join without any payment. Everything is done as a support to Christiania and what it represents.

boingboing via Oblomovka
Trickle-down economics
U.S. national debt in 1980: $930 billion
U.S. national debt in 2003: $6.5 trillion

Number of people worldwide who live on $2 a day or less: 3 billion
Projected wealth of Bill Gates in 2006: $1 trillion

Estimated amount required annually to provide for "the minimal conditions required for the flowering of human potential worldwide," according to the U.N. Development Program: $35 billion
Percentage of the 2003 U.S. defense budget that $35 million represents: 9

What happened to Jesus' passion for the poor in the last 2000 years? In many ways, we have simply created a new religion, that which honors the god of commerce. In order to make this religion palatable it has been linked to Christianity, but basically this is a transitional state. If the migration to the new religion of the masses is completed, Christianity will be of historical interest. Of course, this is hyperbole; but our lack of concern for the poor certainly misses the mark set by our Lord.
Quotes from the Greenbelt blog
Feels like I've spent the whole weekend heading off to this seminar or that band or that event only to get distracted, bump into old friends (hello Mave) or discover new ones only to wind up somewhere else. Somewhere I hadn't expected. Greenbelt seems a bit like that - a sort of winding path, never too sure where it's headed. But headed somewhere good.
Neil McClements

I had my Greenbelt moment early this year. A Greenbelt moment is when, without warning the festival triggers something deep inside, a renewed feeling of deep joy about this event which does indeed liberate. The moment came at the end of the 'opening ceremony' yesterday when festival chair Jude got up on stage with her three daughters and said a blessing, a blessing which contained all those liberating things that mean so much.
Kingdom of God = children's place. Playful. Shrill. Provocative. Not for the bored - but for those with skateboards.

John Davies
Can't wait
i'm dying to here about greenbelt from those who went. so many bloggers were there - post something please!
Peace flags at Greenbelt - reminds me of Italy

Photo: Jonathon Watkins
New to read
the ooze has a new blog now. lots of bloggers that i read have been asked to contribute to it, should be good.
via theyblinked
read this
the article
[Some] say Christian radio makes them feel cocooned, particularly when they play it in the car. It's Babylon out there, corrupt and dangerous, but they drive right on past in their little rolling tabernacles.
What makes the stuff so half-assed, so thin, so weak and cumulatively so demoralizing (even to me, a sympathetic journalist who'd secretly love to play the brash contrarian and rate the Left Behind books above Tom Clancy) has nothing to do with faith. The problem is lack of faith. Ark culture is a bad Xerox of the mainstream, not a truly distinctive or separate achievement. Without the courage to lead, it numbly follows, picking up the major media's scraps and gluing them back together with a cross on top. You like this magazine--you like GQ Then check out New Man, "America's #1 Christian Men's Magazine." Subscribe to Time, you say? Give World a chance. The covers are almost identical.

via theyblinked david hopkins also has some highlights on his blog
hugh & god
Yeah, all this stuff you're doing all the time and I get to see. I'm honored. Obviously not everyone sees it. It's like you're not male or female, you're just air that's everywhere but you can't put a finger on it until sometimes the leaves in the trees blow and make an amazing pattern of light on the grass. People are walking around thinking about everything and then someone actually comes out of their head and talks to you and suddenly there you are, making something happen.

hours of fun for every computer scientist
0110110101101001011011100110100101100101011101000111010001100101 = miniette
the latest lingo
A cute new phrase used my students--
"Aw snap!" (an updated version of the classic "gee-whiz")

- via david hopkins
bloggedy blog
Frankly, I'm tired of blogging about [Christianity]. Tired of the factions, the petty debates, the inchoate chorus of "God-bloggers" who bully and belittle one another, the church, the faith, and the faith of others. The telegraphic posts. The flotsam of links. The attempts at wit and irony. The caustic, know-it-all, soapbox speeches. I'm tired of being a part of that crowd. I wish to wash my hands of it all. For the time being, anyway. Of course, as soon as I say this, no doubt I'll read a posting somewhere, or a news article, that intrigues me or angers me, and off I'll go, into the fray, arms flailing like nobody's business, adding to the confusion and muddle of the blogging hoard.

Ah, blogging. What did we do before the advent of this wonderful medium? How did we get our instant gratification? What was the world like, back then? It's all so distant, so distant in my memory.

- Andrew Careaga via David Hopkins
home sweet home
I'm at my parents' now mooching their washer, dryer, computer, internet, phone and tv. I need to call paulbunyan telephone TOMORROW.
the house has been warmed
The gathering last night was very nice. Sean brought us a clock! It was so wonderful to see Julie G. again too. Lots of reminising, political discussions, and laughs and of course a little beer. I'm still working on finishing my film from cali/last night so I can post some pictures. Also, I think it has some pics from Amber's reception.
someone else for president
voters don't want bush re-elected - poll
- via theyblinked

We're having a housewarming party at our apartment on Saturday (August 23rd) at 8 or 9 - whenever you feel like showing up we'll be here.
1417 Bemidji Ave., Apt. 1, park in the alley, come in the side door.
byob:) see you then.
church clothes
early service:2am is a blog of Church Clothes designer Dave Woodall. It has a ton of links to moral and secular clothing companies including my favorite prophetik.
how close it is to lunch time - joy!
silence please

bodliean library, oxford, england
I've been watching the news. This sums it up.
- via slacktivist
Style is a good thing, Fashion sucks. Fashion will drop you faster than a Vegas hooker while Style will cuddle every night. Take what you can and find your Longtime Outfit before Last Call and you’re wearing hip-huggers and trying to French Kiss the bartender.
last action hero
perhaps the harshest criticisms come from the Arab satellite news service Al-Jazeera, where one commentator notes that Arnold Schwarzenegger's popularity:

... only confirms the world's opinions of Americans ... They like violence, power, revenge, riches, success and fame, and they don't know the difference between real life and fantasy, between real people and characters in an action movie. ...

As for their politics, it amounts to 'looking out for number one.' They don't have a society and don't want one. The world outside America's borders is irrelevant to them except as a threat or a target.

The whole world is amazed that America has fallen under the spell of this cartoonish idiot, this action hero mouthing vapid one-liners. And now we've got Schwarzenegger too.

- slacktivist
troy & erik
those boys have grown up so much since high school. they've become mature, goal driven guys.

i am so thankful that troy took off work to drive me around, be my tour guide, and introduce me to all his friends. he needed a vaction anyway, between his internship at Scream Studios and working at Target he was working around 20 hrs a day. he even took me shopping:)

it was also so wonderful to see erik and talk to him like we did in high school. we can talk forever. he makes me feel like i am the most beautiful, smart, funny person in the world.

thanks guys for putting up with my long showers, long hair everywhere, and taking over the couch for the weekend. i had such an incredible time and i can't wait until i can visit again.

(pictures coming soon)
lax starbucks
the starbucks near gate 22 in LAX has to have the worst service of any coffee shop i've ever been to. 2:00 pm and only 2 employees working. and its not like they were trying to go fast. i swear they had lead weights in their shoes. I waited 1/2 an hour for my single grande iced vanilla latte - that's not hard to make. i wanted to jump back there and make it myself, i wanted to leave - but i paid over $3 for it and i wasn't going to let it go. i was starting to run late for my flight. after i got up to the register and ordered 5 customers after me got their orders before mine.

to starbucks defense, at 6:30 AM in MSP i had wonderful service. there were also about 7 employees working at the time. still, they were all going a mile a minute and it makes all the difference in my patience.

i may sound bitchy - but i've worked at a coffee shop for about 3 years and i know the kind of service that i expect from myself - even when you are short handed and it is not what i received.
Troy drove us over to Hollywood Sunday night. The plan was to walk along the Walk of Fame, see Mann's Chinese Theater, and the Sunset Strip... but there was a concert at the Hollywood bowl - Jazz and no parking under $20 to be found. So we drove past instead, then we headed down to Beverly Hills and Rodeo Drive before returning home.

Erik was off work by then and we all went to the Sherman Oaks Galleria to eat at the Cheesecake Factory. We had a really fun waitress that could actually keep up with Erik's antics. When she was bringing us our drinks, the bottom dropped out of one of the glasses of coke (aparently it had just come out of the dishwasher and the combination of heat and ice broke the glass) and pop spilled all over the table. Seconds later a bus boy was there cleaning it up and the manager came and promised us free dessert! What a deal - good food and free dessert.
celebrity celebrity
people i recognized: melissa from the real world new orleans - she was shopping at the same store i was in burbank, the office nerd from spin city - really tall big forhead, balding, black plastic glasses - he was at American Splendor.

Erik spotted and talked to Hillary Duff at church. We unfortunately attended a later service.
santa monica
saturday troy, ben (kusler), and (ben's friend from college) alexi went to the beach in santa monica. it was a beautiful, clear, sunny, hot day and the waves were perfect for body surfing.

it was my first time actually swimming in the ocean. (In Lido, Italy we wadded in the Adriatic Sea, but didn't feel like going any farther into the dirty water.) The salt water made my eyes, nose, throat and mouth burn, but I still had fun in the surf.

later, we walked the pier and saw street performers and fishermen.

back in Sherman Oaks, we ate at an awesome little chinese restaurant: Rice Wok. Good food, great service and cheap prices. mmm...
American Splendor

I got to see American Splendor! And I got to see it before TheyBlinked. I liked it a lot - we went to see it on Sunset Boulevard. It was only playing at 2 theaters in LA and some in New York and Clevland. It was rather funny and I liked how it was a movie, but the real person it was based on (Harvey Pekar) was in it all the time along with the actor playing him. Unfortunatly, by the end of the movie I had been up for 24 hrs on 3 1/2 hours of sleep and so it felt like it got a little long - but it kept me awake.
random thoughts on this weekend
The soundtrack to this weekend was Switchfoot and Phantom Planet. In the apartment, in the car, everywhere - Troy listens to it, his friends listen to it - not that I'm complaining. California, Beautiful Letdown, Meant to Live - sunny music for a sunny vacation.

I wish I would have taken more pictures of Troy's friends from his college in Florida. They all moved out to LA together. They were the nicest guys I have met in a long time (they also taught Troy how to dress which is good:). I can't remember the last time I had so much attention on me. They were amused at my Minnesota accent.

Troy's friend Greg even took me to the airport! I'd known this person for 4 days and he went out of his way to give me a ride. We had extra time so we stopped at McDonalds. Check out Bohemia when it comes out. It is a musical movie that Troy, (Troy's friend) Dave, and Greg are working on.

I've never eaten so much fast food in my life. I can't believe the cost of living here. Eating fast food is like eating Perkin's here. Gas is $1.99/gal.

It was so hot - 110 degrees everyday.
My first day in California was great. I got up at 3:00 AM to make it to the airport by 4:15. I was the first one there and a little annoyed that I put myself through that torture. I could have slept another 1/2 hour. They didn't even start boarding the plane until 10 minutes before it took off. That's Bemidji for you.

Once in Minneapolis I stopped to have a starbucks on my way from one end of the airport to the other. On the plane I spent my time reading my book and listening to the new MP3 CD I made. In my own little world. I tried to sleep, but was unable. Once I'm up for the day I'm up for at least 5 hours without napping.

My flight came in early to LA. I got my bag and called Erik on my cell to come pick me up. I had extended area - how much is that going to cost? Anyway, Erik arrived in his shiny new white Lincoln Town Car. It was so wonderful to see him. We hugged and couldn't stop talking about everything. He drove us to his apartment, made me lunch and then had to go to work.

Troy, their roomate Ben and his friend that was staying with them were still asleep. So I watched a little TV.

...These boys are just like my friends I visit in the Cities...

Troy had to work at 3, so while he did that I went swimming in their pool. It was nice, I did a little sun bathing to try and fix my tan lines.

I hopped in the shower and when I got out Troy was home. We went to supper at a little Mexican fast food place called Baja Fresh. It was excellent food and service...they kept calling me maim. I asked for a pop and the guy didn't know what I was talking about, so I ordered a soda...
california here we come, right back where we started from

Tomarrow, bright and early at 5:10 AM I'm taking off to California to visit my friends Erik (left, he is Sean's bother ) and Troy who graduated with me. They live in LA and are struggling to be an actor and music producer. I'm hoping to spend time on the beach, go to a movie, and just hang out with my old friends for my long weekend. I'm a little scared about getting to my transfer on time and landing in an airport I've never been to. But they have those handy airport maps in the inflight magazine so I should be fine. I hope my cell phone works out there to - I have to remember to charge it!

I'm hoping that when I get home on Monday night (someone will be at the airport to meet me and) Chelsey will be moved in. As much as I like alone time, its so boring! And hopefully for Ben he has found a place to live in the Cities. Did I mention that the house they wanted fell though and so now they have very few options and very little time. Bummer. He'll just have to stay up here with me;)
sorry about the over abundance of pics and lack of substance lately - i don't really have a good excuse so i'll just apologize.
st. chapelle (i think) and julie g. and me in alsace:

i realized that there were no pictures of ben on this blog! what a travesty. anyway, here are some from the reception this weekend (he's so cute):

nice mullet, huh.

Superball Spirituality
party pics

amber and me, the "bridesmaids", and the "groomsmen" (taylor is holding amber in the light blue shirt)
i just came upon a really cool blog moogaloo via andrew jones. i can't figure out what blog tool they use (blogger, movable type, salon?), are they using their own? but i was very drawn to the layout - posts are contained in boxes, lots of pics (including everyone in their blogroll), and lots of good links.
new chair
its starting to look like people live in my place. i got a lamp on sale at target and put up strings of lights on sunday night. and last night ben helped chelsey move her recliner into our apartment.

chelsey picked up my pictures from amber's reception since she works at target and i'll have a few up this afternoon.

chelsey (left) and me waiting outside the christmas store before it opened in redesheim. doesn't chels have a wonderful sense of humor. (pic courtesy cassie)
WWJ Drink?

The Christology of Wine
Beer and wine are enjoyable gifts of God. This is the teaching of Psalm 104:

You cause the grass to grow for the livestock
and plants for man to cultivate,
that he may bring forth food from the earth
15 and wine to gladden the heart of man,
oil to make his face shine
and bread to strengthen man's heart.
(Psalm 104:14-15)

Wine makes us glad. Wine refreshes. Both wine and beer (a grain wine) are given by God as creation gifts. If we despise wine, we are snubbing the Lord's gifts. In Jotham's parable of the trees, the vine rhetorically asks the trees,

Shall I leave my wine that cheers God and men and go hold sway over the trees? (Judges 9:13)

Wine cheers the heart of man, but it especially cheers the heart of God! When Christ made the wine, he rejoiced in his creation, and when Christ drank the wine, he himself was cheered by it. What was the assessment of the governor of the feast? Amazed, he said,

Every man at the beginning of the feast does set forth good wine; and when men have well drunk, then that which is worse; but you have kept the good wine until now. (John 2:10)

Good wine was the better tasting stuff. Wine is to be enjoyed. Pleasure is not sinful, not if we drink to the glory of God. Including drinking wine,

. . . do all to the glory of God. (1 Corinthians 10:31)

. . .

Wine not only cheers us, it cheers God! And what cheers God ought to be good enough for us. We have no right to despise the Creator's gifts. We dare not charge God with folly for filling our bottles with wine.

- antithesis
From distant to immersed as DJ
Most alternative worship emerges in an evangelical setting. (My PhD thesis "Christian faith making do in a postmodern world" has lots of data to back up this claim). Evangelicals tend to look at culture with arms folded. The world is evil. Christianity is a passport to heaven. Earth is a wait in transit lounge. Pull people in. Quick. Before they're left behind to the tune of Larry Norman's "I wish we'd all been ready".

The alternative worship movement takes the Incarnation much more seriously. The Word becomes flesh and moves in the neighbourhood. God goes to dance parties. Jesus is enfleshed in video loops. Faith is immersed in the city. Steve Collins writes of alternative worship as the end of the weekend. From Friday drinks through Saturday shopping and clubbing to alternative worship as the spiritual chill out time to complete the weekend.

- Steve Collins

I missed church yesterday again. i've only been to church twice this summer. this bothers me. i need church. i need to see people, to sing, to pray, to listen, to think, to be filled, to do nothing for a while.

(note: during the school year i regularly attend methodist, catholic and lutheran services - because none of them get it right, but together they do a pretty good job of satisfying my spiritual need) part of me is frustrated with my home church's decision to go to an earlier service (from 10:30 to 9:00). i feel it alienates young people who like to stay up late on saturday nights and sleep in sunday morning and would appreciate a later service (like me) and embraces the deep-pocketed golfers who want to make their tee time. the other part of my problem is spending a lot of time with a certain person before he leaves town forever. but even the service i miss the most that should be the easiest to go to (5:00 pm sun night), usually falls victim to my excuses to miss (laundry, nap, hanging with mom).

anyway, i was reading steve collins' article from seven magazine about romeo and juliet, postmodernism, and alternative worship and it reminded me how much i want to start alt worship here. but i can't start a christian revolution in northern minnesota if i don't keep my faith as a high priority.

this weekend i will be in california visiting my friends erik and troy. i will definately be able to catch a service with them - maybe i will learn/hear something that will spark my search again.
amber & taylor's reception was wonderful. the band turned out to be really good. neither the bride nor groom had heard them before and they looked a bit punk when they were setting up (which wouldn't have bothered me). but they played a lot of good classic rock and originals. any excuse to dance with ben is a good time:)

unfortunately, target's one-hour developing was unavailable yesterday, but pics from the party will be coming soon.

Julie and Me on top of Mt. Pilatus in Lucerne, Switzerland
It was the word "breasts" that got everyone's attention. There was a jostling movement in the crowd and a shrill woman's voice coming from somewhere off to the left. Most of what she was saying was unintelligible, but some words stood out...
- real live preacher
pics from paris today: the arc de triumph, the view out of my hotel window, and the paris opera house

tomarrow is amber & taylor's reception. they're having a luau with a pig, edible flowers, drinks with umbrellas, etc. there'll be a band to dance to and everyone gets leied!
the pic below is she and i at her bachelorette party in march.

we are having a teacher training in our office today and it amazes me how difficult computer things are for these people. it seems so simple to me, so obvious where to look, click, etc. just use the computer.
a little insurance
i got grant funding to do computer science research for the school year! oh yeah, a thousand dollars in my bank account will be very nice. now on to the work.
"It's one thing to be wrong. It's another to be incapable of imagining yourself wrong."
- Fred Kaplan via slacktivist
"Do you think I'm ditsy?"
"I do, but I like it. 'Cause I think I'm kind of a goon..."
hey somebody linked to me!
danielsjourney posted some links to blogs he has been reading - and i'm included! this will make checking my tracker all the more fun.

cinque terre, italy - the picture doesn't do the ocean or view justice, it was a gorgeous day.
i found this blog on the dean site and his post today comments on a conservative article detailing bush's efforts to buy re-election votes by spending like a liberal

In mathematical terms, the administration calculates that satiated conservatives plus silenced liberals equals reelection. How else can one explain the administration publishing a glossy report criticizing farm programs and then proceeding to sign a farm bill that expands those same programs? How else can one explain the administration acknowledging that entitlements are going to bankrupt the nation if left unreformed yet pushing the largest historical expansion in Medicare one year before the election? Such blatant political maneuvering can only be described as Clintonian.

why doesn't america see that this president is not doing good things for our country?

all fired up to change the world
last night i had a meeting with the dfl mn house 4a candidate. i'm going to be working on the website for his campaign. i had a mock up that i brought and we brainstormed ideas to make it better/more dynamic/aesthetically pleasing. we will be going the dean route and adding a blog. everytime we have a campaign committee meeting i get so excited about changing the world - preserving and improving where we live, good schools, good roads, strong economy, healthy environment, opportunity for all ... he and his committee members are so passionate about working for the well-being of all!

anyway, be looking for a link to his site/blog from here soon.
I should let you know, that everything at work got straightened out and is hunky-dory now.
welcome all fellow eurospringers who are checking out my blog via the link in sean's email. thank you so much sean for that unrequested plug! it's nice to know that i can be of help killing time at work for you. this is actually a time killer at work for me too. is that a bad thing. am i cheating my employer? is it still bad if i had nothing else to do? what if i don't take a lunch break and count the random blog posts as mini-breaks during the day. i'm rambling.
super stained glass

a shot of the st. vitus (sp?) cathedral in prague. they had the most gorgeous stained glass windows of any cathedral we toured. it was all post-world war II, and thus extremely vibrant and detailed. the years hadn't aged and the puritans hadn't destroyed the windows, as it was in many churches in europe.
euro pics

chelsey (right) and i on the tube in london (photo curtesy of cassie)

chelsey stopped by the apartment last night and also ben. we bsed and watched a couple of movies. it was so nice not to be alone the whole time:) i can't wait till she moves in.
it's a good day, but once again 5 cannot come fast enough
work has actually been enjoyable today. computer support went well this morning, with the exception of a nasty call from William Brauer. He actually yelled answers at me when I asked him questions to try and help him.

Dr. Brauer you are a very unhappy person and you like to inflict your unhappiness on others. Please stop that.

i finally feel like i know what i am doing and what is going on at online services. nothing like trying to teach others how to do something to make you learn really fast. but i think that lots of faculty may think that i am a moron now.
jordan cooper may shutdown his blog
one of the first and most spiritually inspiring blogs i've ever read is in danger of being closed. something happened with offensive comments and his own and his wife's blog which made him feel as if his blog was not worth continuing.

it is so frustrating that christians can be so hurtful.
Get dressed try to get blessed
when we call success being blessed we're a moronic confession of a marginalizing binary that likely misses most instances of the divine in this world. as the vaux folks reminded us some time back: god is found in the shit. ...
i am the immigrant.
i am the head start kid.
i am the single, minimum wage mom.
i am the incarcerated.
i am the smelly man asking for a dollar to buy a forty.
what are you gonna do with me?
that's the only salvation Jesus ever spoke of;
a god forever hidden in the peripheral vision of a successful world.

- via theyblinked
jason, kyle, and sean in a little french village, Alsace.

i want to see my boy
ben has been gone since thursday and i have a million and one things to tell him. damn work. why isn't it 5 yet.
sunday sunday sunday
Sunday we had a surprise bridal shower for my friend Amber. She eloped (sp?) in March to the courthouse with her brother and I as witnesses. So, now she is having a reception. She didn't want a shower, but her friend Mandy thought we should surprise her with one - everyone had a good time.

My friend Katie followed me home and hung out for a little while, so now another person knows where I live which is good.

Later, I watched what women want, because I needed a romantic comedy to cheer me up. it always inspires me want to improve myself/surroundings. it got me to do the dishes.
moving sux
Saturday, I moved into my new apartment. That was not a fun job. I had nothing packed. And I realized that I was going to be living ALL ALONE with no phone, internet or cable. I can't wait till Chelsey moves in and I have someone to talk to instead of watching movies. My parents helped a lot and by Sunday evening it was looking and feeling more like home.

The worst part about my apartment is my bathroom. It is small, the sink has an extremely slow drain, and the shower is really moldy. Other than that it isn't so bad.

cathedral in prague - i don't remember what the patron saint was
also yesterdays pic was of a little girl and boy in saint mark's square in venice
i kinda want to cry
maybe taking more hours at computer support was a bad idea. i had a wonderful, fun, time-flying morning at computer support, where i easily moved into troubleshooting over the phone with faculty and staff.

but, since my online services coworker is gone for the next week i have been thrust into troubleshooting a program that i have had zero training in. in fact i have had opposite training. it is an online class shell. i am a webpage hard coder - the templates and how things are created don't make sense to me. anyway i'm being asked to explain to faculty that they need to backup their class, download to their computer, upload back to the server, and reset their class. things i haven't even done myself in this particular odd software. things that they don't understand how to do. they are all asking me questions i can't answer which makes me look like a moron.

we have to do this because we are updating the version of the software we are using. this makes my boss extremely stressed out. and the fact that the student worker that knows what she is doing is on vacation and that i worked all morning at computer support while she was struggling to do a million things at once doesn't help either.

so, a bunch of teachers have reprimanded me for making them do work in the summer when they are not technically on contract to do anything until fall (aren't teachers supposed to prepare for their classes before the semester starts?) and others are confused and just pissed.

and of course ben went out of town this weekend, so i don't have a shoulder to cry on.

*a bright spot - one faculty actually gave me a positive, thankful response. she is my favorite person of the day! she actually thanked me for reminding her to do work and told me she was bringing our office chocolate next week.

*bright spot #2 - liana called me at work! in the midst of my wallowing in sadness she called me up and said "let's do something tonight" yes! time to party the bad stuff away. 5 will not come soon enough. monday will come too soon.

*bright spot #3 - amber called during lunch and will call back later too!

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